I feel so DOWN!!! LOVE PROBLEMS!!!

I feel so DOWN!!! AAARRRGGHH SO SO STRESS!!! Cant I have BETTER life??? Cant I have LESS STRESS? I TRY SO HARD TO MAKE YOU HAPPY!!! I CANT BELIEVE U KEEP THINKING NEGATIVE SIDE. I keep thinking how to introduce you to my family. BUT NOW IS NOT THE TIME!!! WE HAVE SO MANY CRISIS GOING ON!!! CANT U UNDERSTAND MY SITUATION!!! IM STRESS BECOZ I CANT DO ANYTHING YET!!! We been arguing and fighting each other for over 7 days. I try to make it better with you but you keep THINKING NEGATIVE WAY. I CANT DO ANYTHING BETTER YET SINCE I DUN HAVE A JOB!!! HOW AM I GOING TO PROOF MY LOVE FOR YOU!!! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH & BEING VERY VERY VERY VERY HONEST WITH YOU BUT YOU KEEP SAYING I DUN LOVE YOU & CARE FOR YOU!!! WHY IS THAT??? EVERYDAY I KEEP THINKING ABOUT U...THINKING ABOUT OUR FUTURE!!! BUT YOU NEVER LISTEN!!! YOU KEEP SAYING I DUN LOVE YOU ANYMORE. YOU DUN TRUST ME ANYMORE!!! I am SO SO SO SO SO SO HURT!!!!!!!!!!!!! Do you understand my REAL feeling right now??? I GO OUT WITH MY FRIENDS BECOZ THEY HELP ME WITH THEIR BEST!!! I TRUST THEM BECOZ THEY ALSO TEACH ME TO BE BETTER PERSON!!! What is wrong going out with them??? I dint go church with you to meet your family DOESNT MEAN I DUN LOVE YOU!!! ITS BECOZ MY MOM ASK ME NOT TO GO OUT BECOZ OF MONEY CRISIS!!! FINANCIAL CRISIS!!! You know HOW HARD to choose between MOM and GIRLFRIEND!!! UURRRGGHHH!!! WHY cant you understand me??? I TRY SO HARD TO MAKE YOU HAPPY!!! I TRY SO HARD TO INTRO YOU TO MY FAMILY!!! BUT I DONT KNOW HOW!!! THERE ARE SO MUCH PROBLEMS COME OUT....WHAT AM I GONNA DO ABOUT IT??? PLEASE!!! I BEG YOU TO UNDERSTAND MY FAMILY SITUATIONS!!! I told you many times to be patient...WE WILL BE TOGETHER!!! BUT ITS NOT SO EASY!!! PLEASE UNDERSTAND THIS!!! I wan to have many friends...I CHOOSE MY FRIENDS CAREFULLY AND MOST OF THEM ARE GREAT PERSON INCLUDE GIRLS!!! I friend with girls so that I could ask them for help. I WAN TO UNDERSTAND GIRLS SO MUCH!!! I REALLY DUNO HOW TO MAKE A GIRL HAPPY!!! THATS WHY I FRIEND WITH GIRLS!!! I DUN CHEAT ON YOUR BACK!!! I NEVER DID!!! HOW ARE WE GONNA BE TOGETHER IF YOU KEEP SAYING ME DUN LOVE YOU ANYMORE!!! I MUST HELP!!! HELP MY FAMILY!!! BE WITH MY FAMILY!!! I WAN TO SHOW MY RESPECT & HONOR TO MY FAMILY!!! I DUN WAN TO MAKE THE SAME MISTAKES!!! I TRY AND I TRY AND I TRY SO HARD TO MAKE YOU HAPPY!!! EXPLAIN TO YOU!!! BUT YOU.......UUURRRGGGHHH!!!!

p/s : TOTALLY speechless...I never tot this would happen. I feel like...all what I did is just a waste of time and energy. I ALREADY AT MY LIMIT!!! 8 days STRAIGHT we been arguing the same things...THE SAME THINGS!!! THE SAME PROBLEMS!!! sigh~ sigh~ sigh~

Totally need HELP!!!