Happy Birthday

26th September


To My Beloved SiS,

HAPPY BELOVED BIRTHDAY!!! ^^ Hehehe

I know you always can read this...^^ Its been long time...even I forgot about it due to my worst situation but Im glad our GREAT MOM remember it. Hehehe...Isnt she's the BEST MOM? ^^ It so sad that Im dont even have a chance to hold you or you hold me. XD hehehe but I know you always protect us from any worst danger...^^ I can feel it sometimes. Hahaha but Im sure you are happy at you place now right? ^^ Hehehe...anyway HAPPY BELOVED BIRTHDAY!!! Hehehe...May God Bless You Always...


In Loving Memory of Sis
Born 26th September 1978

- Rick JokEr -

My Feeling

This is another topic about my feeling again...I write everything here so that I can feel much relief about everything I been through and hoping it can be solve as soon as possible.

Actually...Its really hard to explain how I feel now...so hard to release it. Its all about me...I really feel sorry about my parents. They work so hard to earn money to clear all debts but me...haiz...go out enjoy enjoy enjoy. Damn...but I do lucky that I realize this before its going further. I even help my new friends to release their stress even though it suffer me more. But this is final...I cant help anymore. I already make my own family suffer so much. I should stop helping anyone anymore. But...haiz I feel really really sorry about everything. Sometimes my new friends want some help I cant even say NO...WHY AR? Be good also suffer...Be bad also suffer...haiz...really confusing. Why everything has to be like this? Why cant everything be fine for even 1 day or 2 days? T.T haiz~ cham ar~ suffer suffer lar...what so ever everything also same. Help or not help also suffer...Be good or be bad also suffer. haiz~~

This is about my head chef...I wanted to tell him everything and I know he will understand but I dont want him to think that Im this and that...bad lar this lar...haiz...so hard if talking someone more older than me sometimes. Different people really different thinking. His friend which also my friend tell me that he dont have a good family since he was born. But he's lucky that he got GREAT family angkat...adoption lar. is that the right spelling? XD hehehe so...haiz I also very very pity him lar. Since small oledi more suffer than me. That is why...he's lucky to have new family that adopt him. At least his life ok oledi. But for my situation is totally different. I enjoy but my family suffer. When I realize it...I CANT even think of something how to help. Want to open business also not so easy...Want to help family business also not yet complete. Haiz...I wanted to work day and night oledi. Gain more pain to have more money. I dont care if Im die...as long as I dont make more debts and sendiri enjoy. I really have less time with family now coz of working at night. I finish work they all sleep. Offday I must go out release my stress on the beach and go yam cha with friends laugh laugh. Really no time at all...I wish to take unpaid leave for 1 week to have family dinner but...the shop I work at totally depends on me...without me all the workers...BOOM...penat and confused gao gao. Even how busy the shop is I still can take care everything as long as no one distract my attention. And the shop really have less workers...haiz~ if got more worker...later jatuh bankrapt ndak cukup pay this pay that. AAAaaarrrgghhh I really wish Im good at office thingy ar~~~ haiz...but...office work...totally not suit me...>.< haiz~~

This is for my Mom...Im really sorry that I use your car not only to go work but also go enjoy and everything. I use your car to go work is ok lar but go enjoy really make me feel very sorry. But I really do take GOOD care your car. I wont do anything that damage the car unless got people go kacau lar...haiz~ T.T IM SORRY!!! REALLY REALLY SORRY!!! You work Overtime to gain more extra money but I use your car go enjoy. Totally UNFAIR...I wish I could be strict everything but most of the time I cant even say NO when friends need help even though it suffer me more...only my best friends and close friends understand me very well...

This is about some part of myself lar...I do really wanted to talk this with someone really could listen to me...even though he/she dont understand what im saying but at least try hard to understand me. I know and understand that out there...there are more people more suffer than me but the way I wanted to release my stress and everything is different. To be honest I dont have balance hormon...so if you find me act like girly bit and childish bit...please lar...be understanding...dont think like Idiot people...dont be brainless. No one perfect...if you think you are perfect...ok...I will challenge you. I dun mind losing but at least I will MAKE you understand. haiz...its like that lar...I cant write anymore coz today I really moody. I cant think good good anymore. I need to think how to solve everything...

Thanks For Reading This...^^
- Rick JokEr-

Recently...

This is about what happen to me recently...

Its all about my workplace, my family and myself...

Damn...I thought this year could be my lucky year but it looks like it is just the beginning of my bad luck.

1st...about my workplace. Hmmm okay okay lar...but I can feel that its hard for us all to get salary increase due to the business. The company having hard time to cover everything...it needs almost like RM2000++ per day to cover everything include bills and workers salary. Since the morning people no longer come work after being scold because dint help clean grease trap and always go after working times up without finishing their work 1st. haiz...morning business no more oledi...boss really rugi a lot...I wonder can cover everything or not...rental oledi nid to pay RM5000++. Then my head chef salary, me, and other 2 people oledi reach RM3000++ like that. But nevermind lar...I give 1 or 2 years chance. If salary still the same...like that I better help my father take care family business. =.="

2nd...about family. hmmm...no update. Because they work morning I work at night...how to spend time together...=.=" haiz...

3rd...about myself. ... ... ...haiz...dont want say anything about it lar. So much bad luck happens...car kena scretch lar. I lost RM50 again...haiz...Why ar...so easy kena bully de me...nevermind...Just be patient...someday...ONE DAY! I will have my own business...

4th...jealousy...XD hehehe why? yalar...go out gai gai always see other couple so so romantic there. Sure jealous ma...wahahahaha XD more weird is I saw malay guy couple with chinese girl...0.o pretty lagi tu. I always wondering how he kao her...hehehe My funny brain side tells me to capture him and bodek his kao lui skills...wakakakakaka but i think different people have different way of kao lui lar...maybe its me being toooooooooo picky or scared to be in couple again. After so many times being rejected so much...I decided to stay single as long as I can. Biar lar jealous as long as I dint lose anything or hurt or something. hahaha...=p

Okay...5th...=.=" im hungry~~ XD wahhahaha i writing this blog while im still hungry....XD

Happy SRJK Shan Tao Reunion Day

13th September

Our SRJK Shan Tao reunion day...not much friends come but can lar...still happy happy there...chit chat doing what...this and that. Hahaha...I was hoping to see more leng luix but uhuhuhuhuhuuh sadly not much and we all sit at the back...sayang my hp still not camera type if not can take some pictures oledi. T.T~ after that meet our teachers that teach us all...laugh laugh...all suprised that we all change. Alar of coz lar...people change due to situation ma...hahaha really cant remember which is which oledi...wakakakaka but at least still respect them as our GREAT teacher. Without them who are we? XD hehehe...

We did take some pictures...XD hehehehehe then we meet our old old retired Head Master or Siao/Xiao Zhang...XD damn my pin yin not so good. XD even some of the teachers always scold bad words to us but they still our teacher. They scold us also got reasons de lar...but if they say they always right sure stupid teacher lai de loh...wakakakakak then after that...continue eat eat...laugh and smile...take pictures...XD hehehe but ok lar...even not much friends come because some oledi go back singapore, KL n etc etc to study and work. Have to understand also because they sacrifice for money. I want to go because I want to meet back all my friends, classmate and schoolmate. I really feel sorry about my work place because usually cannot take Saturday & Sunday as Offday coz BZ day ma...I really sorry but please lar give me one chance for this GREAT moment. Meet back my teacher and say Thank You for teaching me well...teach me chinese language, teach me how to read and everything...without them ar...WHO AM I? Pure kadazan loh...haiz...I like learn something new ma...sure want to learn loh. If not how to LIVE? XD hehehe...thanks to my parents also for sending me to chinese school...XD wehehehehehe

Okay...then...finish loh...10pm after that go yam cha at Horizon KK. Chit Chat with Best Friends and Close Friends...hiyaa all Best Friends de lar...all help me...share feelings and everything. XD hehehe...without them...how my mandarin going to improve? XD hehehe...I really want make 1 BIG party to say Thanks to all my Best Friends, Close Friends and New Friends. All teach me their language...give me the right meaning when I dont understand...something like that lar but I work in Ocean Cafe at night...T.T how to make BIG party leh~~ Nevermind lar...someday that "DAY" sure come one...muhuhuhahahahahah

Okay loh....thats all loh...want full story meh~~ die loh me write everything...XD hehhee

Our Kitchen Life...

Aaahh~~~ Our Kitchen Life~ Wanna Know? Hahahaha...I upload some photos to let you all know what my friend & I doing in the kitchen in our free time. Hehehe...We were bored & decided to do something...So why not try try make flowers using Pan Mee Dough...hahaha

Lai Lai give some commentsss...XD hehehe give us some ideas too...we might try to do it & take a pic on it....Sorry we dont have quality camera...but soon lar...sure have de...kumpul2 money 1st ma...XD hehehe

4th September...My Very Happy Birthday

4th September...

What I Do? Many things lar...

I go dye hair...it is suppose to be light brown dye with light blonde highlight but its turn out to be bright golden hair...T.T uhuhuhuhuhuh that saloon not so skillful eh~~~ sayang my money ony~~ T.T haiz so regret go there...Now even friends sometimes say me lan zhai...adui...punya sakit hati...all pasal tat saloon dint do properly...T.T uhuhuhuhuh haiz...nvm lar...apa boleh buat sudah...oledi pay~~

Ok then...go SHOPPING!!!! okok lar...just buy new t-shirt n jeans...ok ok lar..simple...

Then Go yam cha with OLD OLD OLD OLD primary frens...wah lao so hard to recognize liao eh~~~ plus my new hair style...scared they tot me gengster o wat...T.T haiz...susah hati...next time i left it black colour...=.=" or dye grey colour lar...biar nampak tua at least not gengster look...=.=" have to wait long hair...

Then habis cerita...tats all...XD wahahahhaha

Thanks to all my friends and Old schoolmate in SRJK Shan Tao...

Thanks for celebrating my birthday with such strong...bla bla i oso duno how to say...happy lar...really thanks coz this is my 1st time celebrate like this

Thanks for all the wishes...

So I wish all my friends, old friends, new friends, close friends, and best friends will be always in Good Luck n stay happy especially those who couple couple already...I wish them happy, always understand each other, dun argue for such little matter, dun easily misunderstanding, try and understand even it is big matter...try to understand the reason even sometimes it is "tidak masuk akal", n etc etc lar...many things but i cant type all lar...just can give bit bit lar...so be happy together...^^

I wish all my friends, close friends and best friends to have girlfriend for their soulmate...it is time to find even though it is very hard coz we getting old oledi...once we turn 25-27...we will hard to find girlfriend already...it is already very late liao...so i wish them to have girlfriend as soon as possible so that i can see their TRUE happy smile in their heart...I really wish for it...Im hoping SOOOO MUCH about it to happen...I cant stand to see and hear anything about girls are so bad, this n that...well actually we all the same. It just like maybe give up or sumthing lar...i also duno lar...Just try dont too picky so much lar...I really wish this WISH come true.

For my friends who in relationship...well...stay happy and please try not to break up lar...dun stop caring each other...dun stop trust each other...even got small matter try n discuss about it peacefully...share...we all getting old...we should share and think deeply...how come other ppl can marry...how come we not? we must think in positive way...every road have an end but which road is up to its difficulties...up to ur experiences and suffer to solve it...even though it is hard but there will be end about it. So my 2nd wish is for those who in relationship...I hope dont cheat each other...dont treat each other so badly...just understand each other even ppl think u two not ngam together...no such thing about "You two really perfect couple"...there's no such sentences...at last also break up...whats the use...thats why...TRUST and UNDERSTANDING is important in relationship...Try to understand both side feelings...dont sikit2 make it like BIG MATTER...please dont...i beg for it...dont ever think negative way...If you playboy/playgirl...there must be some reasons why he/she like tat...sure many reasons...we must LISTEN.

Okay lar...So i was hoping my 3 wishes all come true...^^ so that im also happy...lega hati lar...hehehe...


p/s : T.T im not samseng lar~~~ just the colour too bright golden highlight sure mcm samseng...wait my hair tebal liao n no more got colour baru I show my true dye colour favorite...hehehehe...very cool n ehem liang zai...WAKAKAKAKAKAK JOKING JOKING...maaaana ada me liang zai...liang zai in heart GOT lar...XD hehehehe not out look one...XD hehehehe

People Change Everytime...

Nah...This topic about what? About me lar...PEOPLE are changing ma. Everyone changing de lar...DUH!!! What is wrong to throw bit money on cosplay anyway? I know its expensive but...Sabah don't have cosplay event meh? Sure got de...just put some afford lar. RAJIN sikit minta tolong open event...like that oso hard meh~~~ Diao loh...How to grow up ooo??? Enjoy your youth while you can...Dont ever regret in your life. You got only one life...What is wrong to have some fun anyway???

Cosplay = Customes = Clothes = Money...HEALTHY & LAST LONGER...pandai jaga can last FOREVER...

You leh?
Alcohol = Drunk = Cigar = Money = 80% possibility of death...GOOD MEH THIS???

Dont F*cking say me wasted money on customes...What about you then? you wasted on alcohol and cigar that bad for your health...NOT WASTING MEH? You not only wasted your money...you also WASTED your LIFE. DOH!!! Stay out of my way lar...This is me...I use my OWN F*cking money to enjoy...and EVERYTHING IS HEALTHY and LAST LONG one. Better then drunk drunk drunk...lolz...YOU GO DIE EARLY BETTER LAR. Dont make other people suffer by your stupidity enjoyment. Cheh!!! Know say me only but sendiri killing sendiri by alcohol and cigar.

Enjoy your HEALTHY life lar...smoking n drink alcohol so much. For What? Last Last sakit jantung...who suffer? yourself lar...CONTROL lar!!! CONTROL you spending...Spend on something HEALTHY that wont shorten your life lar. You maybe strong while smoking but in future??? I LAUGH AT YOU!!! Yeah Im Weak But I Got STRONG BODY ar...CHOI AR!!! I can live longer oso with CLEAN body. Not with BLACK & WHITE paru paru one. Eeee~~ I rather let stray dogs eat it better then donate to those people who really needs it.

What I want is enjoy my youth time while I can...you ask me go drink alcohol? of coz I drink but 1 tin only. I HATE wasting money on something that spoil my body health. Say la me this n that...not like manly or what. Its better then having UNHEALTHY body anyway. My body is always weak even how hard I train...Only we know our own body health not others...not even doctors. Doctors cannot be trusted sometimes oso. If not my mom already cure loh...my mom still sick...eat this n that. see doctor this n that...still the same not cure. THEN WHAT THE FARK I NEED TO TRUST THEM SO MUCH!!! Isk...

That why people can change due to experiences...yalah not manly like if dun smoke lar, dun drink alcoholic lar, this n that...dont go club...LOLz~~~ you spend me lar...sure I go...im not wasting money for those unhealthy activities. You ask me go club dancing...sure i go but prepare mineral water for me (DEFINITELY NO ALCOHOL). Even IF im a millionaire...I also wont go those such place lar...better use your money and invest more. Make your whole family live with less worries n stress. Haiz...so rich but go enjoy something not healthy...GOOD MEH? If you die & left your money behind...not wasted meh? Become rich then die coz too much unhealthy activities...lolz...so wasted.

Like this lar...Just Leave Me Alone. Dont bring me to unhealthy activities...You go enjoy yourself. I want stay healthy...I dont want to die early and left behind all the debts i had. Normal yam cha ok but dont force me to drink alcoholic so much. My body already weak even how hard I train it but I wont give up. Mana tau got miracle...XD hehe

Anyway Thx For Reading this post...Just to express my feeling bah. Feel so angry when kena say not manly like lar...this n that lar...hiyooo sendiri still susah still want say me...you change yourself dulu...become rich with your own power without any support. You can become that then I follow you...If not? SORRY lar~~ I step on you got lar...lolz I follow your back & leech everything...after I have enough then I betray & backstab you...YOU LIKE IT??? sure not lar...Even Dog that being call Man Best Friend also know how to betray you if you treat them bad lar...apa lagi people? Not only your life will get in trouble...remember that as well. Nothing in this world have the word "SAFE" anymore...

Ok...bye bye.
Thx For Reading...^^